Military Gear & Army Surplus Gear Blog

Flying to Anaheim on 2 hours of sleep

Flying to Anaheim on 2 hours of sleep

– marimba music – Good morning, my dudes it is butt freakin’ early, but of course, we have a flight to catch. Right now, it’s almost 5 a.m, and we are already late. Oh my GOD, demons are gonna attack me. We’re on our way to the airport. We have to be there right now. I’m flying to LA to go to VidCon. I was gracefully invited this year, I don’t know why… It’s gonna be an experience. I’m gonna meet a lot of new people. I’m kind of terrified of that social aspect but more on that later. So yeah, I’ve already packed my breakfast. Mr. Ceddia: Good morning! – laughs – I’ll see you guys at the airport. Every morning in Africa, a gazelle wakes up. It knows it must run faster than the fastest lion or it will be killed. Every morning, a lion also wakes up. It knows it must outrun the slowest gazelle or it will starve to death. All I’m trying to say here is that I’M the lion, and you’re the gazelle It’s 5 a.m and I want to know if you have a moment to talk about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Okay, sorry, let’s get to business~ I have 72 beaver pelts and I wanted to know how many sticks of asparagus that would get me. Ma’am? Ma’am? Yes, are you listening to what I’m saying? Hello. Yes. Is this the police? Hi, I-I was JUST ASSAULTED? Anyways, it was just past 5 a.m when we arrived at the airport parking lot. We were doing the same Shtick as when we flew to New York- we left our car at this very sketchy and ghetto looking parking lot where we would be able to pick it up after this excursion to Anaheim, but don’t worry. It wasn’t US who had to watch our own backs while we were walking through the parking lot, it was everyone else. Why? Because we were the real threat. Anyways after ambushing the taxi driver, we were dropped off at the airport where we would soon be flown to the land of the wild and free, the UNITED KINGDOM (Wait…) I mean States We walked in, ready to rumBLLEEEEEEEEEE!!! and went straight to those little check-in machines that beep and boop and make sure you’re not an alien from outer space. It printed out these really long stickers, which is strange because last time I checked, the airport was the last place you were supposed to do scrap booking in. But that’s a conversation for another time. It was at this time that I also had to dispatch my thicc luggage. This is always really difficult for me because I have a strong emotional attachment to my stuff. What if it gets lost? How will it find its way back home? I cannot bear the thought, but after a while in some high-key low-key coercion on my mother’s part, I was finally able to say goodbye to my stuff. All I could do at this point was just hope and pray that it would be okay and some stupid idiot wouldn’t send it to an alternate dimension by accident. And then we went through the usual airport shenanigans. We stood in this line, walked through this barrier, pressed this button, Threw that liquid out, took those shoes off, put said shoes back on, and then at 6:00 a.m… we were STILL standing in a line. But we got to take some very serious looking photos so that the government didn’t throw us felons into airport prison, finally Finally, we were ready to embark on our flight. All that was left now was to wait a good two hours for the pilots to get their ducks in the line and stuff us sheep into the airplane. But first I had some business of the fecal form to take care of. So I took a little trip to the place that always smells like sh- Hello, my dudes So I’ve come to the washroom to tinkle because my kidneys were about to explode. Things are going pretty well- I’m not hungry yet, but I think that’s gonna change. So I’ll let you know what happens on that. Right now, we’re just gonna wait for the flight. We’re actually sitting at Gate 69. I know. You heard that right. What? Ok, I’ll see you guys soon. It was after my quick toilet run that another issue quickly presented itself to me- It was just past 7:00 a.m, which meant it had nearly been two hours since I had blasting breakfast. So I had at least another two hours until I really became ravenous. Now I was under the impression that the airplane people were gonna feed us- I mean the flight was five hours long and if they really expected me to sit pretty and not get stupid hungry during that time, then they were truly dummies of the highest tier. However, it soon hit me that whatever food they did serve would probably have to be paid for, since there’s literally nothing nowadays that is actually free. (oof) SO, off I went to try to find something to stuff down my gullet when the ravenous monster started straight up yelling from the pits of my stomach. There was everything from muffins to cheese balls to guacamole to sandwiches. THAT’S IT THAT’S WHAT WE’RE GETTING. I don’t care if it’s 14 whole dollars. My bank account can deal with it at a later time. I ran into the airplane since all that sandwich gymnastics had made me late and got situated in my seat. The flight was about to begin. Hello my dudes, it’s 8 a.m Right now I’m watching the movie “Us.” I’ll let you guys know how it goes. I’m kind of terrified though, because I’m not really good with scary movies. I’m gonna be doing hourly check-ins This is a five-hour fight. You don’t want to see me for five hours, let’s just say that. I’ll see you guys soon. Now, during the second hour. I devoured that overpriced sandwich I had purchased earlier for $14. I expected the sandwich to do my laundry, clean the dishes, pay the bills I don’t have and on top of that, taste incredible. However, aside from tasting palatable, there were no other good points about the sandwich. In fact, some yahoo in the kitchen decided to put grapes in it. Which was just beyond logic at that point. Like, we get it, you want to give Gordon Ramsay a run for his lamb sauce. But let me tell you, grapes and a chicken sandwich is not the way to do the damn thing. Hello, my dudes I’m going insane. I thought I would be a happy camper and get through this just like any other day, but no, I didn’t. The movie is really good, I have to say. Okay, that’s all I have to say. Goodnight, see you tomorrow. My dudes, we are officially in the canyons. This is the middle of nowhere. This is savage land. People didn’t come to play any games here. No, they didn’t. This is where the poop hits the fan.Are you gonna let the wild bamboozle you or are you gonna bamboozle the wild? It’s up to you my dude. There’s one hour left of this flight. I need this to end, like really badly. I don’t know about you, but the earth seems pretty flat. Maybe the flat earthers are correct. I’m so sorry It was the final hour my dudes. I was almost finished with Bohemian Rhapsody and I was a whirlwind of emotions. There has to be a way to exchange Freddie Mercury for a little pomp, there has to. On top of all this emotional mess was the earache caused by the constant pressure changes. The plane was starting its descent and with every second that passed I could hear less and less actually it was at this point that I realized how much of a concrete city Anaheim is from a bird’s eye view. It literally is a concrete jungle Maybe it’s because I’m used to Canada, which is pretty much all forest, but it was definitely a bit shocking for me. Regardless, we were off the plane and left our own devices to figure out our next step. That’s an easy slice of pie No, an easy pie slice? A pie of easy slice? Anyways, it was time to pick up my luggage. This step always increases my heart rate tenfold and makes me sweat to the absolute extreme. It’s literally like a game of roulette. It’s the most stressful thing ever and I hate it intensely. Every bag that gets deposited that isn’t mine makes me that much more anxious and I immediately assume the worst. What is my luggage jumped off the plane and is now somewhere in Nebraska? But of course, the God spoke and my bag finally showed up. She was doing well with minimal scratches and bruises. It was like a weight had been lifted off my feet. It’s at this point that I would like to say a quick thank you to our chauffeur, Alejandro. He’s a really cool dude and he only played 80’s music on the car ride to the hotel which both my parents and I appreciated very much ๐Ÿ™‚ I just want to say thanks, my guy. But through the streets of Anaheim we drove, taking in the scents, sights, sounds, and peculiarities of the city around us, and after a good hour of driving we arrived at the hotel and I, I was appalled at the room that the people at VidCon put my parents and I in. Oh my god this is like the biggest hotel room I’ve ever stayed in. What the heck is happening? We have the body lotion. We have the facial soap. It’s not a cookie. Trust me, I know. Can’t forget the roll of toilet paper. And the toilet itself. Hey there buddy. I’ve never seen this. You know, I don’t really know what this is. If anyone knows what this is, please tell me. This is like a new contraption. I feel so out of place. Yes, Joana, out of place you certainly were, be careful that you don’t break anything though, I’m not paying for the mess I make, but that’s besides the point. A good two hours later, my parents and I were hungry, so we decided to hit up the birthplace of Hell itself, Target. We’re hitting up target, I need a bunch of things that I also don’t need. So the best place to go for that is Target. This is what you see when you enter into hell. (oWo) We found the mother load. These are so tiny and dinky though. I don’t like them and they’re harder than a rock. You know what, this is pathetic. Target, I’m mad at you I’m suing. This is your fault. *Sigh* Okay, okay, the avocados were atrocious. But I did settle for this do-it-yourself salad that tasted quite scrumptious. Who knew crafts and salads could make a good match-wait. WAIT Wait, what? The only other thing I remember from that fateful night was waxing my little lady mustache. My mother decided it was time I start waxing my face. So she picked up this little box of hell and decided to attack my upper lip. Was I scared? Of course. I was having a tough time putting on my big girl panties. Oh my god. Oh my god. No laughing, not a laughing matter. Oh, ooh! I’m not laughing, I’m not laughing! Hello my dudes, if you’re wondering why I’m lying on the floor, it’s because I just came back from a run. It was nice and cloudy outside. So I thought I’d take advantage of it. No, the hotel was not giving us avocado tortillas. My mother actually went back to Target last night and picked up some tortillas and some avocados. Not gonna lie, this morning, not many things are happening. I’m probably just gonna edit or like the first two or three hours and then I’ll have lunch and then I’ll see what I’m up for. For here’s your avocado tortilla. Actually, no, it’s mine. Shut up. The editing crunch was about to begin. I took a shower so that I wasn’t that nasty sweaty mess I usually am after I finished running and got to work. There was a lot of stuff to do and iMovie was really doing the most here. Yes. I use iMovie to edit my videos. I’m too scared of Final Cut Pro, it has too many buttons and I’m scared that if I press the wrong ones, it WILL implode. Anyways, at 11 a.m I was ratted so I mustered up enough courage and ordered a fabulous chicken quesadilla with a lovely side of sautéed veggies. Let me just say that the minions in the hotel kitchen really did the most here with this case and yet it was amazing with seven G’s. My only issue was with the broccoli, which was weirdly under cooked and had the same texture smell and taste as a loaf of paper, and required 10,000 Newton’s of mandible force to bite through the quesadilla though. Oh my god. It was amazing My taste buds were quaking in their boots the guacamole – okay, this got me suspicious. It was amazing – too amazing. I, she who is in a romantic relationship with avocados, was feeling slightly attacked. Was someone wanting to start something? Was somebody watching me? WHY DO I FEEL LIKE SOMEONE’S WATCHING ME? I can’t enjoy my tea. Can I have my privacy? Stop playing tricks on me>:( Hello, my name is Joana CEDDIA and my only personality trait…are my pants ๐Ÿ™‚ Hello, my dudes so it is now later during the day and my dad had the nice idea of taking a trip over to VidCon itself and just walking around seeing the lay of the land These pants are going to definitely ruffle some feathers, but I don’t care because I LIKE THEM. “Where are you from?” You may be wondering-IT’S ARITZIA. Let’s get going. This is gonna be fine. I’ll take you guys along with me I don’t actually know if I’m allowed to be in VidCon right now We’ll figure it out my dad and I will just show up. Maybe they have food That’ll be exciting. My camera’s about to die I will see you guys soon. VidCon, the wild wild west. It was time that I confront the biggest Internet convention on the planet head-on with the help of my dad dad of course. NOW, I didn’t know, this but as a featured creator I was not allowed to actually be out in the open at VidCon so that Logan Paul running through the fountains didn’t happen again. *uhoh vietnam flashbacks* But THANK GOD im not Logan Paul or anything close to him because I was actually able to walk through the main hall. it was It was fun and I got to meet so many of you guys had a manageable rate, so it wasn’t too chaotic. Now, VidCon itself truly is a production that only America could pull off. It’s insanely huge and crazily busy. There are so many things happen all at once and bombarding you that you have to walk with all of your eyes open-two is not enough. But regardless, my dad and I went. We had fun and we experienced it. It was a full-on RIOT to be frank with you. Too much fun, but not enough at the same time. And at the end, we jumped into a big bad scary car and were driven home to the hotel where we were soon tasked to going out to dinner. [thud] OW! Hello my dudes what’s up, what’s going on? It’s now time for lunch. Lunch. No, it’s not time for lunch. I had a brain fart. Okay, it’s dinner time. We are going out to a steak house. My mom’s also dressing up. So I thought I better dress up to maybe look a bit nice. My dress… IT’S FROM ARITZIA! I don’t know how much I’ll be able to film there to be frank with you. I kind of am a little bit tired. So I don’t really know how much I’ll be able to film. So yeah. Thanks for coming along. Thanks for being you. You’re doing a good job there, buddy. I’ll see you guys later. it said “suck my left toe horizontally from the ceiling” if you were wondering.

Reader Comments

  1. That is the reason I'm going to move to Canada, I don't care what I was going to sacrifice, because it's the Hufflepuff of the world and it's all forest…..

  2. My personality is Joann ceddias personality and Antonio Garzaโ€™s personality combined ๐Ÿ˜‚โค๏ธ

  3. I'm definetly the only one that heard Freddie Mercury's "Of the world" from We are the champions, right? ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  4. Omg I donโ€™t know why this is important but Joana your middle name is Campos my last name is Campos!!!!!

  5. Final Cut Pro is hell, I almost deleted my video for my Video Production class two years ago ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ

  6. The minute she said โ€œthere has to be a way to exchange lil pump for Freddy Mercury there just has to beโ€ I SUBSCRIBED

  7. My mom says I am old enough to not act like a child and ummm .. well at least Iโ€™m not the only one 2:07

  8. "Suck my left toe horizontally from the ceiling"
    Words of wisdom from Joana Ceddia while she still had her virgin hair
    Your content is great btw!

  9. When you vomed in it you feet with tha Chanclas and the ๐Ÿ˜ค socks I WANTED TO BEAT YOU UP but in a nice way ๐Ÿ™ƒ

  10. I loveeeeeeeeeeee your vids your so funny๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€

  11. nobody:

    not a single soul:

    not even James:

    not even the Cookie Monster:

    Joana: suck my left toe horizontally from the ceiling….

  12. I need to let this out…


  13. โ€œThere has to be a way to exchange Freddie Mercury for Lil Pump, there has to!โ€œ hahaha I think I just weeโ€™d

    find the W you wont Jonh Cena
    " Joana Ceddia snaps"

    im sorry for using your name in vaiiiin "turns into ashes"

    my job here is done ๐Ÿ™‚ says Joana Ceddia(aka Jonh Cena)

  15. when you said that you edit with Imovie I cheered with joy!!! >:OOOO (I use Imovie for editing all my animations and school videos)

  16. if anyone didn't know what that split second said it said "suck my left toe horizontally from the ceiling" -Joana Ceddia ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  17. I canโ€™t believe she thought pulling out her tiny microphone in the bathroom was a great place to do an update

    But i love it

  18. I feel like if you wrote down everything you said in this video it would be the hardest story in the world to read

  19. Joana. PLEASE COME WITH US TO AREA 51. Bring your arsenal of Nerf guns for the weaponless. And eat lots of acorn squash and avocados the night before so youโ€™re not RAVENOUS. Wear your yellow pants as a distraction for the guards. WE NEED YOU.

  20. Girl if you suffer from airplane ear like I do – and I mean SUFFER like 10/10 pain when a plane descends – try some of those "earplane" ear plugs. They slow the pressure change process within your ear so you have more time to adjust. In addition to that, take a pseudoephedrine before each flight in order to open up your sinuses and Eustachian tubes. This works for me every time and I have not had any problems since employing this method.

  21. I love her but the hacking and coughing drives me up the wall with actual disgust. Why? I get it. Youโ€™re funny, youโ€™re pointing out the obvious and doing everything a filmography er would hate.. but itโ€™s GROSS!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *